Feb 12 2010
Evaluating The Family Before The Birth
The miracle of life happens every day. Yet when it happens to you it often triggers a period of reflection and insecurity in life, relationships, and even work. There is a simple nesting period that many of us go through that includes a lot of introspection.
Any committed long term relationship can go under evaluation during a pregnancy. Most of the time this is the event that either creates unity or signals that there are only individuals trying to force their square pegs into round relationship holes. As the idea of family approaches you find that it’s easy to share the fun stuff but not so sure about sharing the whole idea.
You’re days are filled with the fun of selecting your baby girl or baby boy bedding and picking out the perfect baby safety monitors. You banter with each other about which are the best diapers and then you spend your spare time making sure that you didn’t overlook anything when you were baby proofing.
Coming together and addressing your concerns and your fears within the relationship does not pose the same kind of fun, and therefore many of us avoid it. Yet the fears you have and your constant questioning will not stop unless you and your significant other opt to really sit down and talk about where you are and where you want to be.
You may just have cold feet. Going into a lifetime commitment with anyone is a scary proposition. Even if you got married, everyone knew there was always the final option of divorce if it didn’t work out. Now with a baby on the way, your commitment to your partner needs to feel stronger than ever.
Talking over all of your fears together can really lead to some great surprises. It can show you where your weaknesses are and you both can cement those relationship strengths. When you come to the conclusion that you reach, most of the time the effort and time put into the questioning was well worth the outcome.
If you want to keep your pending family intact then you have to recognize that you are part of a team, a family, and that not everyone on the team is going to be on the same page all of the time. There will be different opinions, and being able to find the best answers from those opinions is the key to creating a strong family.
